Quotations
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Humor
«Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Funny,
Humor
| Keywords:
circumstances, laxative, laxatives, pill, pilled, sleeping, sleeping pill, the Pill, under
«Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.»
«Now we all know that Fidel Castro dressed up like Marilyn Monroe and gave JFK a case of syphilis so bad it eventually blew out the back of his head.»
Author: Stephen Colbert
| About:
Humor
«One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a computer microchip, can actually travel ahead in time and shave beard hairs that don't even exist yet»
Author: Dave Barry
(Humorist, Writer)
| About:
Funny,
Humor,
Technology,
Time
| Keywords:
Ahead Of Their Time, ahead of time, announce, announces, announcing, beard, bearded, bearding, development, Gillette, hairs, in time, microchip, microchips, razor, Razors, shave, shaved, shaves, thanks
«Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mind-bog-gglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as the final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God.The argument goes something like this: `I refuse to prove that I exist,' says God, `for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.'`But,' says Man, `The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED.'`Oh dear,' says God, `I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly vanished in a puff of logic.`Oh, that was easy,' says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and getshimself killed on the next zebra crossing.»
Author: Douglas Adams
(Writer)
| About:
Humor
| Keywords:
And logic, and so, argument, arguments, Babel, black, blacker, Black a, bog, bogged, bogs, by chance, clinch, clinches, clinching, coincidence, coincidences, crossing, dear, dears, denies, easy going, encore, evolved, evolves, evolving, exist, existence, existence of God, final, fish, giveaway, God is dead, improbable, killed, like this, non, promptly, proof, prove, proves, puff, puffed, puffing, puffs, purely, QED, refuse, The Argument, The Blacks, The Dead Man, the existence of God, the next, The Thinker, thinkers, useful, vanished, vanishing, white, zebra, zebras, zebra crossing
«'Make a remark,' said the Red Queen; 'it's ridiculous to leave all the conversation to the pudding!'»
Author: Lewis Carroll
(Logician, Mathematician, Novelist, Photographer)
| About:
Humor,
Poetry,
Surrealism
| Keywords:
pudding, puddings, queen, red, remark, The Conversation
«Most species do their own evolving, making it up as they go along, which is the way Nature intended. And this is all very natural and organic and in tune with mysterious cycles of the cosmos, which believes that there?s nothing like millions of years of really frustrating trial and error to give a species moral fiber and, in some cases, backbone.»
Author: Terry Pratchett
(Writer)
| About:
Evolution,
Humor
| Keywords:
backbone, cases, cosmos, cycles, evolving, fiber, fibers, frustrates, frustrating, go along, intended, millions, mysterious, organic, trial, trial and error, tune