Quotations
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Comedy
«My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'»
«NEW RULE: 'Kidiots' Leave the children behind. At least until they learn something. A new study has shown that half of American high schools agree that newspapers should only be able to publish government-approved material. Almost one out of five said people should not be allowed to voice unpopular opinions..This is the first generation after September 11th, who discovered news during a 'watch what you say' administration...George W. Bush once asked, 'is our children learning.' No, they isn't. A better question would be, 'is our teacher's teaching?'»
Author: Bill Maher
(Actor, Comedian, Producer, Writer)
| About:
Comedy,
Politics
| Keywords:
administration, American government, approved, bush, Bush Administration, George, George W. Bush, George W, newspapers, New American, publish, schools, school teacher, September, shown, The Children, The New American, unpopular
«My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.»
Author: Jerry Seinfeld
(Actor, Comedian)
| About:
Comedy,
Family,
Funny,
Law and lawyers,
Parents
| Keywords:
Florida, sixty
«[Mock singing] ?And shall my sword sleep in my hand?? [Speaking] ?NOT a good idea, you?re gonna roll over and cut your bits off.?»
«My sister wanted to be an actress. She never made it, but she does live in a trailer... so she got halfway. She's an actress, she's just never called to the set.»