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shirts
«The laundry has its hands on my dirty shirts, sheets, towels and tablecloths, and who knows what tales they tell.»
«My overcoat is worn out; my shirts also are worn out. And I ask to be allowed to have a lamp in the evening; it is indeed wearisome sitting alone in the dark.»
«Fortunes made in no time are like shirts made in no time; it's ten to one if they hang long together»
«COMMONWEALTH, n. An administrative entity operated by an incalculable multitude of political parasites, logically active but fortuitously efficient.This commonwealth's capitol's corridors view, So thronged with a hungry and indolent crew Of clerks, pages, porters and all attaches Whom rascals appoint and the populace pays That a cat cannot slip through the thicket of shins Nor hear its own shriek for the noise of their chins. On clerks and on pages, and porters, and all, Misfortune attend and disaster befall! May life be to them a succession of hurts; May fleas by the bushel inhabit their shirts; May aches and diseases encamp in their bones, Their lungs full of tubercles, bladders of stones; May microbes, bacilli, their tissues infest, And tapeworms securely their bowels digest; May corn-cobs be snared without hope in their hair, And frequent impalement their pleasure impair. Disturbed be their dreams by the awful discourse Of audible sofas sepulchrally hoarse, By chairs acrobatic and wavering floors -- The mattress that kicks and the pillow that snores! Sons of cupidity, cradled in sin! Your criminal ranks may the death angel thin, Avenging the friend whom I couldn't work in. --K.Q.»
Author: Ambrose Bierce
(
Editor,
Journalist,
Writer)
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Keywords:
aches,
acrobatic,
administrative,
Angel of death,
attend,
audible,
avenging,
bacilli,
bacillus,
bladders,
bowels,
bushel,
Capitol,
chins,
clerks,
cob,
corridor,
corridors,
cradled,
crew,
cupidity,
death angel,
disturbed,
efficient,
encamp,
entity,
fleas,
fortuitously,
frequent,
hoarse,
hoarser,
impair,
impaired,
impairing,
impairs,
impalement,
indolent,
infest,
infested,
in full view,
microbe,
microbes,
pages,
pillow,
porters,
ranks,
rascals,
securely,
shin,
shinning,
shins,
shirts,
shriek,
shrieked,
shrieks,
snared,
snore,
snores,
snoring,
sofa,
sofas,
tapeworm,
tapeworms,
the Commonwealth,
The Pillow,
thicket,
thickets,
thronged,
tissues
«Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.»
Author: Dave Barry
(
Humorist,
Writer)
|
About:
Football,
Funny
|
Keywords:
Chicago,
fans,
football,
football game,
Football games,
games,
January,
sharking,
sharks,
shirts,
tough
«I have known a German Prince with more titles than subjects, and a Spanish nobleman with more names than shirts.»