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PET
«America will tolerate the taking of a human life without giving it a second thought. But don't misuse a household pet.»
«Individual grievances and pet peeves have got to go by the wayside. Generally, you don't have to worry about the guys who are playing every day, it's the guys who are sitting on the bench that are the ones that get needles in their pants.»
«I'm scared to death of being poor. It's like a fat girl who loses 500 pounds but is always fat inside. I grew up poor and will always feel poor inside. It's my pet paranoia.»
«Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things»
Author: George Carlin
(
Actor,
Author,
Comedian)
|
About:
Humor
|
Keywords:
PET,
pets,
pettier,
petty,
sweat,
sweated,
sweating,
sweats,
sweaty
«A lover tries to stand in well with the pet dog of the house.»
«BEN: You lucky, lucky bastard. BRIAN: What? BEN: Proper little jailer's pet, aren't we? BRIAN: What do you mean? BEN: You must have slipped him a few shekels, eh? BRIAN: Slipped him a few shekels? You saw him spit in my face! BEN: Ohh! What wouldn't I give to be spat at in the face! I sometimes hang awake at night dreaming of being spat at in the face. BRIAN: Well, it's not exactly friendly, is it? They had me in manacles! BEN: Manacles! Ooh oooh oh oh. My idea of heaven is to be allowed to be put in manacles... just for a few hours. They must think the sun shines out o' your arse, sonny. BRIAN: Oh, lay off me. I've had a hard time! BEN: You've had a hard time?! I've been here five years! They only hung me the right way up yesterday! So, don't you come 'rou-- BRIAN: All right. All right. BEN: They must think you're Lord God Almighty. BRIAN: What will they do to me? BEN: Oh, you'll probably get away with crucifixion. BRIAN: Crucifixion?! BEN: Yeah, first offence. BRIAN: Get away with crucifixion?! It's-- BEN: Best thing the Romans ever did for us. BRIAN: What?! BEN: Oh, yeah. If we didn't have crucifixion, this country would be in a right bloody mess. BRIAN: Guards! BEN: Nail him up, I say!»
Author: Monty Python
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Keywords:
all right,
Almighty,
arse,
bastard,
ben,
bloody,
Brian,
crucifixion,
crucifixions,
friendly,
get away,
God Almighty,
guards,
hard time,
hung,
jailer,
lay off,
mess,
nail,
offence,
off guard,
Oh Yeah,
PET,
proper time,
put in,
Romans,
shekels,
shines,
slipped,
slip away,
slip off,
sonny,
spat,
spit,
the right way,
the Romans,
yeah
«A real Christian is the one who can give his pet parrot to the town gossip»
«maybe humans are just the pet alligators that Gd flushed down the toilet»
Author: Chuck Palahniuk
(
Journalist,
Novelist,
Satirist)
|
Keywords:
alligator,
alligators,
flush,
flushed,
flushes,
humans,
PET,
pets,
toilet,
toilets
«I'm so ugly - I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get»
«Good works never languish for want of funds; the Lord will come to their rescue. Only it may take some time; do not lose heart... You should not collect money in devious ways. Help should come from pious hearts, from well-earned money, from persons who know and appreciate the purpose for which they give. That is why I oppose all benefit shows, where you tempt people with a dance or a drama or a film and collect money for your pet plan.»