Quotations
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Late Night
«How did it get so late so soon? Its night before its afternoon. December is here before its June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon?»
Author: Dr. Seuss
(Cartoonist, Writer)
| Keywords:
afternoon, afternoons, December, goodness, June, late, Late Night, night time, soon
«I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night.»
«Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.»
Author: Stephen Wright
(Actor, Writer)
| Keywords:
cards, died, full house, Late Night, playing, poker, pokers, stayed, Tarot, Tarot cards
«Then awake! the heavens look bright, my dear; / 'Tis never too late for delight, my dear;/ And the best of all ways / To lengthen our days / Is to steal a few hours from the night, my dear!»
Author: Thomas More
(Chancellor, Humanist, Statesman)
| Keywords:
best of all, Days of Heaven, heavens, Late Night, lengthen, lengthened, lengthening, lengthens, steal
«When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.»
Author: George Carlin
(Actor, Author, Comedian)
| Keywords:
An electric, candle, Edison, electric, electric light, gas, gas lamp, lamp, Late Night, that much, Thomas, Thomas Edison, urgent, worked
«I saw a product on late night tv. It said, you can water your hard-to-reach plants with this product. Who the fuck would make their plants hard to reach?! I know you need water, but I'm gonna make you hard to reach. I will throw water at you. Hopefully they invent a product before you shrivel and die. And they said, you can have this product for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like to see a product that was available for three easy payments, and one fuckin' complicated payment. We ain't gonna tell you which one it is, but one of these payments is gonna be a bitch: the mailman will get shot to death, the envelope will not seal, and the stamps will be in the wrong denomination...Good luck f*cker! The last payment must be made in wompum!»
Author: Mitch Hedberg
(Comedian)
| About:
Funny,
Television
| Keywords:
available, bitch, complicated, denomination, denominations, envelope, envelopes, fuck, fucker, Fuckin, good luck, hopefully, invent, Late Night, mailman, one shot, payment, payments, plants, seal, shot, shrivel, shriveled, shrivels, shrivel up, stamps