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Joan Rivers Quotes
«I have no methods; all I do is accept people as they are.»
«Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer.»
«You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again»
«People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.»
«A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He gave her a labotomy.»
«Boy George is all England needs - another queen who can't dress.»
«My mother could make anybody feel guilty - she used to get letters of apology from people she didn't even know.»
«I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.»
«Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.»
«There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.»