Quotations

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Erma Bombeck Quotes

«No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.»
«As a graduate of the Zsa Zsa Gabor School of Creative mathematics, I honestly do not know how old I am»
«I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it.»
«Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.»
Author: Erma Bombeck | About: Football | Keywords: brain dead, declared, row, watches
«I don't know when pepper mills in a restaurant got to be right behind frankincense and myrrh in prominence. It used to be in a little jar that sat next to the salt on the table and everyone passed it around, sneezed, and it was no big deal.»
«The bad times I can handle. It's the good times that drive me crazy. When is the other shoe going to drop?»
Author: Erma Bombeck
«The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with ONLY a loaf of bread are three billion to one.»
Author: Erma Bombeck
«I was going to have inner peace if I had to break a few heads to do it.»
Author: Erma Bombeck
«When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.»
Author: Erma Bombeck
«There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it wants to eat at 6 P.M.»
Author: Erma Bombeck | Keywords: eat at, figure, figure out, PM

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